Sunday, August 24, 2008

Random Brain Flash: I Will Never Be The GOP Presidential Candidate

Any resemblance to John McCain, owner of as many as ten houses, and this young lady clutching too many dolls is purely sadistic on my part.
But I'm a bottom feeder dirty hippie, so what I say doesn't count.

Random thought of the day: I have at least four or five tire gauges. I found them cleaning the shop and the back room yesterday and this morning. While I was doing this, I took a nanosecond to remember how many houses I have, and what kind of car I drive. And since I knew the answer was that I only have one house and one car, and that I knew the make and model,I decided that I could never be a Republican candidate for President. Then again, I have to drive my car myself, and my household staff budget is several hundred thousand dollars less than some folks I read about, so maybe it's easier for me to keep track of these things.. I was once in a nine or so bicycle-cade group going to a coffee shop, though.

But it wasn't a Starbucks, and we didn't have armored bikes. And I didn't have a latte. Bleech, hate lattes and cappucinos. I thought most republicans did too, because they always talk about us Latte sippin' Volvo driving bleeding heart wannabe surrender monkey sodomite libuuurls. But I guess that's ok when John McCain wants one like he did last week.

It makes sense. Only somebody who was desperate and had no other choice, or who who has more money than sense would go drink Starbuck's charred bean infused bovine mammary secretion drinks.

Do you ever wonder if there's a lab somewhere filled with doctors and cyborg service people who perform brain-o-suction on people who run for office as Republicans? Suck out the firm moral and empathic sections of their brains and replace it with a chewy, gooey center that contains receptors for talking points?

Imagine a nonstop loop of this crap running nonstop:

Nancy Pelosi liberal values!

Saddam was a bad man!

Queers destroy marriage!

All drugs are bad!

Clinton got a blow job!

He was a P.O.W!

'nuff said. I go now, to make more salsa. Happy Sunday.

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"Sometimes a scream is better than a thesis." Ralph Waldo Emerson